We have known the Bright and the Dark side of sexting, suggestive messages, and lurid – pictures sending to unsuspecting or jaded individuals (Or a group, I don’t judge).
We’ve gone from A/S/L in chatrooms in shady cybercafés to having messaging apps overflowing just for happy, safe, private messaging. A
nd we have social app giant Snapchat which enables us to send lewd pictures to anyone minus any consequences provided the receiver does no screenshot game.
My first attempt, sorry exposure to sexting, was in school when I was 14 years old. I was sifting through the features of the illegal music downloading site/software BearShare, since LimeWire shut down years back.
Now, you’re open to discussing my current age in this situation, but not digressing; they had a feature of a chat window, where random people with a username could message you.
Looking at my contemporaries, who were already hooked on Orkut and had already made “friends” there, spending days sitting in front of their personal computers or on the telephone, blushing and giggling (gross!).
Thus, I too wanted to go out on a limb and talk to a stranger. I went past a few chat requests which looked like nothing but bot-banter, and after one guy showering compliments, I was too smart for, I got a blinking chat request from someone.
That someone succinctly said, “Hey, wanna sex chat???”
And me being the chaste, naïve school girl (no, I was not a crescendo to an X-rated movie), well, freaked out.
Did he use the word SEX? Did he want to SEX CHAT?
I can’t even mouth an I-love-you and he expected me to talk about intercourse where my knowledge was limited to gasping about kissing scenes in movies and knowing that my period meant something dying inside me?
Crazy, I know, but those are kids. I replied with a couple of expletives, and I being a prepubescent teen, felt too entitled about using The Bad Words.
But then time went past and boyfriends happened, with each one being slightly older and slightly more experienced than the former and explaining how things went about.
It went from “I think you have beautiful eyes” to “I can’t wait to see you wearing an XYZ in an ABC place” to straight-up something too kinky and embarrassing to mention here.
Sexting is a great exercise, like virtual masturbation. It is exercise because it does burn a few molecules, hush.
It’s like an ice-breaking activity even before the foreplay, because you simply text what you have in mind, what you feel about the person. No one actually mentions it, but everyone does it. This is like the reverse of doing drugs.
Everyone talks about how they are doing “it”, but no one is actually into it. Sexting and satisfaction have been studied and proven, too!
What is the similarity between having sex and sexting? Many, if you ask. First things first, in both of the cases, your fingers get tired, you do have a release, you have to coax your significant other to do little somethings (No one readily wants to wear lace or even text about it in this sweltering heat, okay?), and you ALWAYS end up red-eyed.
All that being said and done, you must think, is sexting as good as the real deed? If you have a pathetic sense of imagination, well, no.
But why not see a small list and see why having one hand in your pocket and one on your phone screen (while you take your oath “I mean every word I say and I will sincerely imagine playing Naked Twister with Nutella slathered on my body for my love”)
1. No after-sex cuddling. You don’t need to customarily rub yourself against each other after rolling in the hay after sexting. You can wallow in your own sweat and body fluids instead!
2. No mess to clean. As above mentioned, you do not have to worry about fixing sheets, cleaning the floor, or white–gloving any surface. Well, unless you take the Nutella-Naked-Twister seriously.
3. Knock, knock, no one invades your privacy. You can do it anywhere, be it in your room, your bathroom, or even inside your packed car, if you’re not driving, obviously. You do not have to worry about the aftermath where you are slurring and unable to tell your clingy partner to leave (I know, you still live with your parents.). Speaking of sexting in cars, it’s a matter of self-control and you might need a preparatory Kill Bill or Rocky level training montage.
4. You get away with it. This is the most important, the operative of sexting. It’s not commitment. It’s unnecessary to know the person inside out. And I would not encourage, but I know many acquaintances who got away with cheating by saying, “We didn’t exchange any pictures. We just sexted.” It’s safe unless you’re a politician or a major celebrity, or a pretty simply alien who can’t understand cloud storage. Since we still live in a place where slut slash body-shaming is a way of life, we’d rather send a lurid text rather than having our intimate pictures for the world to see.
Well, this should convince you enough to go and tickle someone’s “E- spot” and have some fun.
Also, “What are you wearing ;)” is outdated. Be creative.